And as He walked by the Sea of Galilee, He saw Simon and Andrew his brother casting a net into the sea; for they were fishermen. Then Jesus said to them, “Follow Me, and I will make you become fishers of men.” They immediately left their nets and followed Him.
When He had gone a little farther from there, He saw James the son of Zebedee, and John his brother, who also were in the boat mending their nets. And immediately He called them, and they left their father Zebedee in the boat with the hired servants, and went after Him.
There are so many things I appreciate about Jesus Christ. I appreciate that He is patient and kind, that He takes time for the sinner and cares about the outcast. I am a Christian. I want to be like Him.
One of the traits that may not be commonly attributed to Him is confidence. He wasn't insecure. He was fully God of course. But He was also fully man. He walked in our flesh, faced the same temptation that I do everyday, and He died having defeated it all.
I usually associate temptation with sexual issues, or indulgence of the naughty kind like alcohol, gluttony, drugs etc...
Today as I was praying it struck me into the core of who I was that He must have also faced the temptation to make His life all about Him. This is my understanding of insecurity having faced it for so many years in various ways.
Insecurity is the total obsession with how others see ME, what they think of ME, how I am doing in every thing I do. Do others speak well of ME? Do they think good thoughts of ME? Am I a good wife? A good mom? A good leader? A good example?
I don't think these are bad questions necessarily. I do however, think they can be a trap. As a Christian, there is a deeper calling to magnify the Lord and not me, my problems or my personality.
As a mom, I feel the constant pressure to be a good one. Sometimes, I want my kids to behave so I look like a good mom. This too is backwards. No one can make me look like a good mom, a good leader, a good wife. I am or I am not. The fruit will answer the question in the end won't it?
It is not comfortable to have a child going through a tantrum, bad attitude stage, but that is really their problem to overcome. In the end they have to choose to overcome or society will revolt against them and they will learn the hard way. It is not their job to make me look like a good mom. And it is simply my job to give them the best I have and believe that God will make up the difference.
As a leader, I find myself looking over my shoulder to see if anyone is following. Will people sign up for discipleship? Do people still believe in the process? Are we doing a good job?
And this is where that scripture hit me like lightning this morning. Jesus wasn't insecure about being a good leader, preaching the most relevant message, being cool enough to follow. He was Jesus, and He believed in what He came to do. He was simply a great leader, and people naturally followed Him.
I enter this with a deficit, because I am not the Son of God. However, I do follow Him. I like everything He does (maybe not in the moment, but in the end He does make everything beautiful in His way). I am His biggest fan.
When I follow Him, I don't need to worry about others following Him.
He doesn't worry.
He loves, He reaches, He is truth and He never changes. His truth changes everything.
It is captivating, and irresistible.
My job is to demonstrate that irresistible love, and through everything in my life cry out "following Jesus is the only thing that really matters or makes sense in this lifetime".
That cures my insecurity. He has been in the business of drawing all people to Him since the beginning of time. I think He can handle this generation with all of its troubles, lures and traps.
I can keep walking forward with the assumption that as I echo His call, hearts will change, lives will change, and generations will be forever altered because we heard His call and we followed Him.
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