eternal

i have been thinking the past few days about Ecclesiastes - the part where Solomon boldly declares that there is nothing new under the sun, and that all is vanity. It does, at first glance, seem a bit pathetic - a cynics end to a self indulgent life. he had seen it all, tried it all, had it all. he had women, power, money, influence, etc... and then at the end, to say it is all nothing? it seems sad.

but as i get older, i see his point.

don't get me wrong. i am 100% optimist. i am a painfully "look at the bright side of life" kind of creature. so believe me when i say, it is not cynicism. it is reality.

this life goes by so fast. so so fast.

and we are so so busy.

doing what?

filling our days with work, pleasure, purpose as much as we can find it.

but what remains?

only love.

love is the only thing that stays. and that is the only lasting impact of how we affected the world around us. the things we did out of love are the only things that make it when i leave this place.

i was thinking about this because i was watching a speech by a guy who was talking about what we leave with all the social media, blogging, text messaging, email, etc... he said the amount of information left about us is unprecedented (i know, big shocker, but think about it). he talked about a guy who knew he was going to die of cancer, and he had his friends post his last blog the day he died.

but then what? what happens to all of his other blogs and who will care to read them? only the ones who loved him.

then i thought about all of my silly status updates on Facebook. i wondered how weird they would sound when i am long gone. who is going to care that i didn't sleep well, for like 3 years? I am weird, i know, but this is what i have been thinking about between breakfast and bath time.

i am, as always, determined to live each day to the full - sometimes this thought drives me crazy because i wonder if i am allowed to nap on a day lived to the full - but i also realize that sometimes i am just busy, doing the practical and necessary stuff that i need to do to get by. a life lived in love also includes laundry and dishes. i can't always be the one having significant moments with people - there are times i just need to do the small stuff.

but i am thinking again, what will my legacy be? who will i have been a part of? who will know that i loved them? i mean really loved them? i loved them not because i had to, but because i wanted to.

i hope the message of my life is not that i cared about people because it was part of my job description, but because it is my life calling and the only thing that really matters.

I will still put dumb status updates on Facebook, and i guess it will be up to another generation to figure out what to do with all of this information. i do just pray that in each day i find a way to make another person feel significant, cherished and important.

in the end, that is all that matters.